Resolution Reality Check: 3 Reasons Your Resolutions Will FAIL!

Posted: January 3, 2013 in Deeper Things, Paths To Conquer
Tags: , , , , , ,

Enter: New Year’s Resolutions!

This resolution was S.M.A.R.T.!

This resolution was S.M.A.R.T.!

Nothing fascinates me more around this time of year than to hear all the promises being made, and wondering which words were changed from the last time they were made a year ago. “I’m gonna work out” changed to “I’m really gonna work out”! The inclusion of the word “really” was the missing link the year before, and must be the reason it didn’t work out… Pun intended.

Let’s be honest. Your resolutions are probably not going to survive. Life happens. You won’t want to admit it now, but if I posted this in 6 months to check (maybe I’ll do something like that), you’d realise you’re not doing what you had set out to do, and even if things have changed, it wouldn’t be the way you planned.

I’m gonna give you a 3 REASONS WHY YOUR RESOLUTIONS WILL MOST LIKELY FAIL! Yes, I said FAIL! And I’m sure there are far more than just 3 reasons…

1. YOU HAVEN’T CHANGEDfunny-new-years-resolutions-quotes

This is an issue of character more than anything. We tend to avoid taking responsibility for our previous failures in life, coming up with elaborate excuses and amazing blame-shifts. Either it was the economy, or your boss didn’t give you enough time, or you were lazy…OOPS that last one wasn’t supposed to be in there!

We are masters of maintaining ourselves for better or for worse. We suck at adapting in ways that are intentional or that confront our current realities. We can do the “gradual comfortable slide” into some things, but face it, your resolutions need a jolt……..that you’re not going to produce! What you’ve experienced and what you know are all that will influence you in the end. Nothing new will happen, and your resolution will just be a mild distraction from your daily routine. And we all know how to get rid of distractions don’t we?

2. THE PERSON MAKING THE RESOLUTION ISN’T THE PERSON WHO WILL ACTUALLY DO ITsuperheroes-batman-superman-resolutions

I remember during a mentoring session with a young man who had this big massive colossal vision of here his life was going – as most young men have. There was a point that stuck out to me. He said “I feel like the man I want to be is standing on a distant mountain and I’m just looking at him”. This comment highlighted something we tend to undermine: the difference between the person making the resolution, and the person actually doing it.

Did simply declaring a resolution suddenly manifest all the habits and competencies required to make it happen? Bet you it didn’t. This is the problem with the “affirmation phenomenon”, or even better, the “law of attraction”. You’re told that “if you say it enough, believe it enough, it will happen”. Unfortunately there are a lot more people not changing than people who are, and the reason is that talking changes nothing, habits do!

For you to pull off your resolution, you’re going to have to change. See the connection with #1? Who you are now, is just looking at who you want to be from a distance. Unless you close that gap through some serious diligent discipline, kiss your resolution goodbye…..until the next ‘Resolution Resurrection Day’ (the next New Year’s Day)!

3. YOU MADE IT MORE ABOUT THE DATE/TIMING, THAN ABOUT THE DECISIONny1

I’m sure you know that the beginning of a year is very important. It marks new opportunities and new chances to do something great. Right? Wrong! That only counts for the few who actually take themselves seriously. Note: THE FEW! We’re more caught up in the hype of the date, than the impact of the decision!

If your resolution was so important, so crucial, so necessary…why didn’t you decide it yesterday? Or the day before that? What about December 10th??? I’ll tell you why, because New Year’s is “special”…..in your head! It may be a new year, but it’s not a new life! If you were more serious about your life you wouldn’t wait for something as insignificant as a date, to make a significant choice about who you will be! You would act a lot sooner – or at least differently – if the decision took center stage, and not the date.

And really, if it “has to be started on New Year’s”, then  let me ask another question, have you prepared for it? Have you counted the cost? Have you looked at how it will impact your finances, and accepted that information? Have you put it into your planner for the year? Do you have a planner? Are you waking up now?? The date is really only a reference point in a very long process. It’s just an indicator. A mark. It’s nothing more than that when you look at it.

Look, if you want something new to happen, most people think the same, so the desire itself is nothing special. However what makes it special is this:

– Understanding what it will cost
Find out what it will take to pull off what you want. Go on the net and research. Google is your friend…unless you have real friends that can help you. Talk to them…AND Google!

– Accepting that cost
You can find ways of minimising financial impact by looking for better deals and the like, but you can NEVER minimise personal impact! Live with it!

– Paying the cost
Put it down in your schedules, set alarms, place debit orders, save up, read, run…WORK!

– Choosing to be changed by the process
You will fight and resist this decision with everything in you. That’s one fight you want to LOSE!

– NOT waiting for something to happen, but PREPARING for it
This relates closely to paying the cost. The idea here is that you want to ‘put things in order’. If it’s a new exercise routine, which one? How often? A new book every month? Ok…have you got an idea of the first 3 months of books? What’s the process of choosing books throughout the year? This step is really about CLARITY OF PROCESS. 

And lastly, REMEMBER WHY YOU MADE THE DECISION IN THE FIRST PLACE! 
You probably weren’t happy with something, and that’s an okay-ish initiator to your decision. However, in the long run, perks are better motivators than problems. So you’ll want to make the perks of your decisions the key things to remember. The problems can only make you recognise the need for a decision, but cannot sustain one.

It’s time to put the RESOLVE back into RESOLUTIONS.

Over.

At least there's honesty!

At least there’s honesty!

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Comments
  1. […] Resolution Reality Check: 3 Reasons Your Resolutions Will FAIL! (overthemaze.wordpress.com) […]

  2. Khomotjo says:

    Hey Maze
    I like this piece think I’m reading it for the third time now.
    I absolutely agree.I think it’s funny how the daily minute is not as “hyped” about as the year.
    Big Thumbs up 😉

    • The Maze says:

      Hi Khomotjo
      Thanks for the thumbs up. Much appreciated.
      If any resolution is to survive, it needs to become part of every moment, as opposed to attached to just one date.

      Be aMAZING

      The Maze

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